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1. |
Gave Up
03:03
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the pen and pad jotting down whats in my thoughts only
i dim the lights pour the whiskey lit cigar smoking
spit it til the booth on fire and my jaw toning
my goals to get a ‘mil house’ like im barts homie
I drink away the pain while sipping til the bars closing
cause I am sick of broken promises you talk phony
it be impossible recouping what you all owe me
I knew this path wasn’t paved feel im off roading
letting go of those I held inside my heart closely
rocking with myself til im old like bon jovi
from one ear then out the other had me eye rolling
ignoring comments I dont even got the time scrolling
im just tryna make the best of this divine moment
cause artists get replaced each year like an I phone is
while the media’s brain washed and blind folded
goin out like heath ledger think that im joking
my fam gave up, my friends gave up, my girl gave up, shit I never gave up
made the beat, put it on repeat, fill another sheet
ignoring those who front on me, move feet in front of me
I deuce-peace who trouble me, never gonna lose sleep
cause truly, I wanna be ,
the underdog who gets to the top to scream fuck em all
going head on thru the obstacles im the juggernaut
no longer sit warming the bench , cause im coming off
and I dont even gotta coach but learning imma god of flows
tell the competition adios, get your body smoked
like spare ribs on top of coal,
theres only one EYE and im sharp rocking a monocle =—
and never fucking say you had my back either
back hand your forehead like a bad fever
I aint stopping til im feeling like the grass greener
putting numbers on the board like a math teacher
I book the show, go promote, gotta take control
invest in merch, hope it sold, not breaking even tho
still stay dripping in sauce like made pizza dough
and run the game waring out bottoms of all sneaker soles
my dj wouldnt play my record thinks it doesn’t fit
afraid to go against the grain and play some other shit
a&rs never bring to their meetings
cause ill scare em with my honesty and status quo they leading
I story board it, go direct it, then I shoot and edit,
movie credit, use investments, but only few attentive -
they do neglect it but who defend him Im losing henchmen
keep my diary digital like im judy jetson
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2. |
Enemy Ft. Shadow
03:48
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Not love in the first place
Built from a different cloth you covered up shirt stains
heart on my sleeve like nothing can hurt meh
I’m Living the hustle wit duffle of merch slanged
I Wonder who serve late
But up and I’m early, saying what’s up, if giving a pound it come with a firm shake
I’m loving to curve hate , oh the irony
Not vegan but I can’t stomach you bird brains ,
Demons love when I burn sage
Bleed and none of you first aid
Not filling up banks, barely can fill up my tank
But feeling I’m filling the ranks,
Spartan like Michigan state, My vision is simple and plain,
Take over my own lane, keepin the drive with no road rage ,
Keepin the smile with no Colgate, keepin the fire with no propane
Talent is show cased, but still I’m a no name
Not hitting my prime I’m feeling I don’t age
Only been growth made , so kick out the chair I’m extending the rope length
Liquor with no chase, I am the rain the minute your clothes hang,
The crack in your phone screen, The hill to your home base
Wrong order from post mates, the one you should obey
I’m seasoned like old bay , it took you a while to catch on you people are so late, it’s OK
Knowing it’s my time, go update your time lines, I’m aging like fine wine
A giant who rise high, but just over 5 5,
Not playing the side lines, won’t even sit side by side, with anyone less than a prince chillin with Cyhi, while sippin on mai tais,
give you a rush like when you go sky dive, heard that you like mine
But we arent like mind , see that I’m moving and jump on the wave to meet at the high tide , Seek and you’ll find right, My talent ain’t finite
From morning to twilight, I’m working to rhyme tight, still wasnt given a piece of the pie slice ,
Believing is hindsight, they back when there’s highlights,
Roping you in while hoping it’s knotted and tied tight, then reading me my rights
No law to abide by , negotiate my price
If they don’t get it I wing it like eye line
staying connected I’m stealing your WiFi , but I tried
im being the same me, no label can change me
they finding it harder to label what makes me , or where they can place me
expanding the radius more that they gate keep, the more that I break free
they scoring a touchdown playing baseball, we not in the same league
tellin them take heed, I open the cage leave, not saying it vaguely, its simply comparing the plate of a steak steamed
to canning of baked beans , or static to HD,
its havoc im raising, going on tour im calling it paid leave ,
travel the country people relating, but I been escaping
the trouble at home in art im creating, not falling or fading
life a bitch im calling it baby, and stalking it crazy,
im needing to win , dangling feet but I’m eager to swim
starving myself but ill eat in the end . cutting off ties you wont see em again
Ill leave in the wind
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3. |
Mourn Different
04:03
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A friend died when I was 19
lost track of what life means
had the funeral the day I had my road test
same road that he drove when his soul left
everybody going visiting his family
im feeling guilty with anxiety im panicking
cause the pain inside their eyes couldn’t bare to see
my excuse leaving town cause its scaring me
I don’t wanna see them hurt
not engraving your memory on my shirt
I dont want to rock an RIP decal
no facebook post will be seen now
went to his grave site once, and I haven’t been back
its hard to admit but I’m lost into thinking that place is where you’re actually at as a matter of fact
its just how I adapt, afraid to get too close
been a while since I let those balloons go
and I haven’t even visited the new home
I dont wanna see your face on the tombstone
I just want to keep thinking that you moved on
and you’re coming back to visit not in too long
and you’ll tell me how you listened to my new song, that’ll be great
yeah that’ll be great, lets have another day I know you can’t stay
but for now ill raise, this glass in the sky lets all celebrate
yeah that’ll be great, yeah that’ll be great just one more take
like nothing every changed, lets find another way
cause we all mourn different now, see we all mourn different
see we all mourn different now, see we all mourn different
wrote a song for you, it was all I knew
how to get out my feelings try to talk to you
but the awful truth, I was starting to, feel like people made it popular and lost the mood
cause I never made it trying to make my name big
but it started catching on to my amazement
everybody had it added to their playlist
and requested that I did it when the stage lit
but it didn’t feel right something not clear
making profit off of someone who is not here
now im seeing fake friends in the halls cheer
giving pounds after they ignored me all year
had me feeling guilty and I really felt I burst
til his mother told me how much that it meant to her
and his sisters started quoting each and every word
that’s the only gratification I get that works
so I deflected the pressure and took it all down
every website clear started posting new sounds
and although they keep on asking I won’t put it back out
thats the only time was getting love inside my home town, what now
keep screaming out loud , found out that the way you mourn is never forced, I’ll, pour out just a little bit I cant afford much
and I know you would much rather have us pour UP so just,
know that it doesn’t matter how you were showing your emotion when they hold them underground
you can shed a hundred tears or not even hum a sound
but that never was a measurement of love you summoned proud
I vow, to appreciate the time we all spent, with denial off set
and the cries we all wept
we can smile without feeling guilty at our own pace
never had to showcase your weight yeah that’ll be great
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4. |
Godzilla
03:04
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doomsay when i step on the scene
luke cage im defending my team
making anyone an enemy plea - it aint a deal cause you sell it for cheap
mentally ill, call the kettle black
im 2 faced, I dont need a better half
chasing my ex didn’t use a treasure map
did you fall from heaven? I would love to send you back
lyrics on your headstone write an epitaph
you speaking through a wire but this aint a telegraph
a man of many hats like the manager of lids
no days off I aint planning out a trip
shit you only made it far cause your family is rich
I aint saying you a bitch but the mannerism fits
fathering your style Im a parent to your kids
apparently you drip think the camera playing tricks
I am manic when I spit, like the ammo in the clip
going rambo in this bitch move the planet when I shift
I am failing to exist in the standard that you live
get on wax and you couldn’t hold a candle to my shit , make a wish
stomp in cities, towns, destroy them all, imma go godzilla
when I go godzilla, im a god but ILLa
pet dogs telling humans go and fetch balls
piss on the feet of the people who in the next stall
you set bars I set lists to check off
ringing off like hitting sonic the hedgehog
you all fake pussies like a sex doll
I talk on your expense like collect calls
nobody ever safe I offend all
beat banging like the gangs out in crenshaw
only gas you up for a quick check
then screw you over with a contract misread
fed lies from liars who have been feds
save 5 then kill ten, then they go and celebrate
know they full of shit in they pig pens
never coincide with the witness
its all one sided like the helmet on big ben
believe it when you die but they needing a 6th sense to invest
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5. |
Fake It Til You Make It
03:42
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I just wanna fuck and make music
is that too much to ask?
im addicted to the high like a junkies stash
head of haters laying out like a pumpkin patch ,
im replacing all your oxygen with mustard gas,
all you pussys act tough like a thundercat
you convincing as when dare taught drugs are bad
putting girls in the position of a jumping jack
less she burning up the tip like the blunt you ash
rather chillin in the pad cause the clubs are trash
while you running up your tab just to stunt on Snap
I adjust my sack, give my nuts a scratch
open hustler mags and then I just relax , what you fuckers lack
yesss, this aint a humble brag
its duct tape, hands tied while the trunk is latched
keep it a buck like deers mounted, and keep doubting
but im keeping it a thousand
now I just keep on taring em down
wondering what we fake caring about
wont bite my tongue no hand on my mouth
wondering what we fake caring about
opinions lost but sharing it proud
wondering what we fake caring about
wont think on your own they tailored your style
wondering what we fake caring about
born in a cage thought flying was an illness
anxiety worse but try and be resilient
im broker than ever but mind on a million
they leading the nation with lies from a villain
I keep to myself and focus on me
with the hunger of a wolf in the clothes of a sheep
only growth that you see is if your dough is increased
but that money wouldn’t save you while your soul is in grief
the celebrity suicides that no one would see
cause the happiness portrayed isn’t all what it seems
got you praying for a god clenching rosary beads
why there couldn’t be a sign or a note at the least
but its hard for you to notice while they pose when you meet
and your fake caring barely carry over a week
but you did for the likes, thats enough right
your computer screen carrying the sun light
with a laptop and mic i record in my room
and consider im an artist mother fucker thats true
take a picture with a filter you photographers too?
posing naked on your instagram, you modeling too?
I dont wanna hear a word about what imma pursue
im believing in myself and thats a problem to you?
you just mad you invest in every job that you lose
too afraid to take the risk stomach knotted in 2
every time that I fail its just a lesson I learned
and I dont know how to quit until I get whats deserved
they like, “you still rap?”, well I see youre not supporting
so when I make a fortune dont go asking for a portion
from passing out cds to traveling and touring
call them small victories to me they’re enormous
I arose like a florist, and never forfeit
til the forbes list is forced to conform with him
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6. |
Good Die Young
02:36
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10 toes down imma stand on 2 feet
putting in work never put in 2 weeks
fuck em if they hate imma still do me
said its all gravy eating poutine
ill be in the back with a set of 2 freaks
while your man grill like a set of new teeth
said her ass real, shit coulda fooled me
cause it looking faker than a rappers jewelry
im just looking for a way to cope
giving her permission to my phone
I aint worried what its gonna show
cause she fucking with the girls im bringing home
she asking that I put my hands on her throat
it got me as stiff as a mannequin pose
im packing out seats like a Hamilton show
and ‘kneading’ this bread like im handling dough
If the Good Die Young we gon’ live forever
I be on my grind like im Otto Rocket
told me I would fail this a bigger plot twist
bass hitting harder than a Hogan drop kick
key to the city im a fucking locksmith
not a single label gonna hold me hostage
I aint cuffin shit ‘less she into bondage
in a skirt blowing pipe she aint even Scottish
imma put that pussy in the care of hospice
how you be a vegan but you swallow?
I be living like theres no tomorrow
you didn’t have a dollar I could borrow
now I got your girl rubbing wood like the Apollo
im smashing her melons my dick is like Gallagher
giving me head on the road as the passenger
schedule open she fit in my calendar
killing these amateurs wicked as Aleister
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7. |
||||
look me up and down based on image they gonna profile
try to change it up wanna rearrange my whole style
telling me its better if Im shopping out in so cal
dress me in designer full of names I couldn’t pronounce
nothing is organic, shit, you cant put your phone down
following a trend tracing over what they mold out
I aint getting fed if im speaking with a closed mouth
letting out opinions I no longer fear and wrote proud
all I have is me, thats the lesson that learned quick
all my closest friends only left me with a burnt bridge
every girl I loved had me feeling I aint worth shit
carrying these memories ill bury in my hurse with
thinking this is punishment and maybe I deserve this
hanging off a cliff but surviving with a firm grip
only by believing I can make it as a wordsmith
know I wouldn’t be here if I didn’t have a purpose
why, why, do they all lie,lie
when I had gave my word it stood for something now I know your good for nothing
why, why, I dont have time, time
you thought without you that I couldn’t function now I know your good for nothing
rather have you tell me to my face you never fucked with me
lay it on the table if we eating you were unwilling
used to wanna build a buzz with me, now your buzz killing
easier to see its in your genes and its unfitting
my blood spilling I give you chances to stitch it up
and you were missing I witnessed early and will adjust
but once removing all your expectations
and dont rely on anybody you feel ventilation
keep cutting out the people with no renovation
they aint helping you build they just a drunk acquaintance
its a suckers making, or how their mother raised them
only down for breaking bread if I get underpayment
putting money over loyalties an understatement
they’ll be waiting at home while you run the bases
and my circle getting smaller every day that passes
then its turning into apathy like chain reactions
they aint wishing you success, if you may surpass them
go from giving you the drive to wish you’d play in traffic
but the headache hasnt lasted past a baby aspirin
im the optimum main attraction no cable package
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8. |
Selfish
03:57
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while im straining my neck, I complain im depressed
as I lay in my bed, contemplating my death
I keep blaming the stress on the decaying of strength
they inflated my head, like”you can make it I bet”
it aint raising my spirits , I keep raising my meds
if im raising my spirits its whiskey staining my breath
place im paying for rent, is that of ancient decent
the water full of rust and mice are playing in vents
but its a place I can rest, shit, some food on my plate
look in the mirror shut the fuck up all you do is complain
if you wanna be a movement start pursuing the change
instead of glooming over losing go and rule in the game
you expect forgiveness just because your mental illness
you’ll keep coming up short like having sex with midgets
you extend the vicious cycle to the hell your living
kept your distance from succeeding due to health conditions
so much fucked up shit in the world, and im out here stressing a girl?
theres a war going on in my mind, but a much bigger war outside
im selfish, I know
im selfish….so?
a hopeless romantic who’s known to go panic
when feelings would overflow, he’d overdose xanax
acting so stranded with cold hearts he’s handed
depression gone manic when love lost and vanish
feast or famine , so weak, believes in marriage
but can barely hold relations for weeks before its damage
soaked in self loathing broken and kept coping
with bottled insecurities shelved for his next showing
but fuck that, go and grow some hair on your nut sack
you were tonging women more than leaf on a blunt wrap
now you been heart broke and suddenly lost hope
downing endless liquor double fisting til bar closed
go piss with the seat down while passing on rebounds
guess the random hook ups aren’t all what they seem now
go and join the party of the love and the lost
while you second guess the randoms when you fucking them raw
still complaining on sales and feel your train has derailed
spending more than youre making and still afraid you can fail
you just run around in circles while youre chasing your tail
even tho you quit smoking feel youre taking an L
if you listen to the haters than you made ‘em prevail
had you blinded by their words like you tracing on brail
almost choking on stage until your face turning pale
til you started rocking stadiums and making them yell
now the labels showing interest while you buzzing online
and the kids’ll play your music during troubling times
cause you never left the feeling of that hunger inside
and instead of giving up you told your mother you tried
headliners getting nervous of the opening act
all the ones who used to hate are hoping homie collabs
I have chosen this path. found the gold imma stash
til im soaking in gas burned by strokes of the match
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9. |
Pop Smash
03:03
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I been here searching for help but only was finding vices
so now im hitting the pedal harder than time crisis
the thrill is heighten like going inside the ring with Tyson
I got you hooked more than your fishing license , go dive in
im rapping tighter than tourniquets knotted over biceps
made sacrifices like god deciding on binding Isaac
righteous, blowing up like kamikaze pilots
attacking those who riding waves like trained Somali pirates
I take out kings of highness with violence and pile drive ‘em
like Xangief facing Bison, decipher the lies your hiding
who’s on the island im in, ill dig the grave you’ll lie in
no longer minded my business but staying business minded
I been a giant while killing tyrants so bring your finest
make North Koreas missile crisis feel like children fighting
the real are sick and dying but searching for silver linings
till walls are covered in plaques like causing gingivitis
but first I need a pop smash, like a mother fucker
what I dos different concluded the mood shifted
I wish you would then never grant another 2 wishes
say your jewels glisten, thats cool, you shoot vicious?
but I dont feel the strap on you like some loose bitches
im deuce deuce sipping, posted like a stool pigeons
I hope you keep your life guarded like a pool victim
im different on tracks Im moving to a new distance
im out this world used the moon when I threw discus
so who is this? no presence like a jews christmas
im hot headed like a flu sickness, driven like a tube piston
in a coupe civic
you thinking youre ahead of me and got your roof missing
we group together like school fishes, sharper than groom clippers
anyone can get it like soup kitchens , dudes listen
im the reason that your boos missing,
when I slid into her dm’s like some room slippers
she got a cute figure, dont know how you with her
an oxymoron like listening to a mute singer
a few fingers will get her wetter than pool skimmers
but I dont got enough money to go and do dinner
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10. |
Richard
03:53
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run the game and got respect, im Barry Sanders
You run the game because of politics, Bernie Sanders
all you do is fix your hair while making girlie anthems
im Humping legs in the club, I’m more a dirty dancer
was kidnapped my fam said I wasn’t worth the ransom
watching violent movies suppressing my murder tantrums
short ugly and broke, yeah im a loser huh
so how he picking up girls? im cool as fuck
putting women on their knees more than buddhist monks
and when they done giving head, already losing trust
let it slide my cunninglingus is exercised
rode my mustache forgetting Burt Reynolds died
Spiked the punch at your party mixer
aint a diamond in the rough, just a garbage picker
and I am farthest from a father figure
talk to my dick proper, call it Richard
how they making money spitting wack shit
cause even peasants can sleep on a kings mattress
I got nothing to prove, you the muscle for who?
act hard, you hold your nose when you jump in the pool
stay in school, upgrade, im the one for the youth
show support I claim your kids on my W2’s
fuck your censorship so delicate and sensitive
hug and kiss on my bone, exoskeleton
blame it on the fact forgot to take my medicine
I aint a dog-ma, just a fan of Kevin Smith
complain I hate my home town then go and move back
spray tan my dick, orange is the new black
cooking minute rice in less than 50 seconds
I get a rush from sex if she been infected
I was only trying to fuck thats why I built a friendship
and when I get a chance im busting in a millisecond
it was great for me I hope that you enjoyed yourself
if not then I can play the part of voyeur well
They say to manifest your life it’s all that you control
thats why im wearing all black to plan my funeral
i find it suitable casted in this movie roll
I play the part of murphys law until I losing hope
getting hooked if you dont chant my name like Ruffio
if it aint proper then remove your tone
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11. |
||||
label me whatever you want, im on the hunt
in an action packed thriller doing all of my stunts
hanging off the clock tower got me feeling a hunch
that my time is now, never am I giving it up
yeah im ballin on a budget but I think its enough
when I walk around feeling like a million bucks
got the crowds hands up like im sticking ‘em up
haters getting crossed out like a ministers son
imma lead an empire like Attila the Hun
I just try to stay focused without Ritalin drugs
I was never satisfied with a minimum buzz
so im headed to the bar tell ‘em “fill up my cup!”
my Achilles heal guarded with the will to adjust
never stop the campaign when im willing to run
all that negative energy imma spill in the dump
they wont pair-us together im in the city of love
I aint lost but I wander, what’s the cost whats the problem
where’s the heard where’s the honor, on your mark, from the bottom
but I dont give in, I give enough, said I dont give in I give enough
im a brother a friend a lover and even an enemy
a son, im a sinner and they giving meaning for me to breathe
beaten repeatedly but I wouldn’t go easily
got an angel and devil giving advice to me equally
at least have the decency give me praise like a jesus freak
while im eagerly seeking a way to increase the frequency
wanna profit but legally, guard my pockets from thievery
clear my debt and my visa fees start enjoying the scenery
build a team that believe in me and im leading them regally
in the green like a sneaker cleat money suffers obesity
thru a system of evil greed, policing you dealing weed
conflicting as freedom speech, when protested peacefully
I competed thru misery that was frequently weakening
still exceeding in a city known for Jeter and pizza grease
im telling them read and weep , I see who I dream to be
a product of environment that put the mc in me
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12. |
Half Moons
03:50
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Half Moons on the table top
there’s no use I cant make it stop now
another failed attempt getting off a med, im stressed
thought I had in the bag and was strong enough to give it a rest
the withdrawal had me feeling like death,
suffered brain zaps that i wouldn’t wish on my ex,
accept im a wreck, check, wept, a pessimist, yes
night terrors that would haunt if i slept , the cause and effect
the nausea and stress, hence the jaw that i clenched
put the night guard into shreds while clawing my chest
the palpitations were adjacent to the palms that would sweat
the tinnitus that im fighting had the audio bent
had me screaming “fuck it all” could you pardon my french
suicidal thoughts vivid find it harder to vent
mother feeling helpless sitting at the edge of my bed
wishing she could talk me off the ledge of mental neglect
settle for less, relieve the pressure set on my head
can’t remember times better have no memory left
now im staring at this pill that I thought I could quit
how the fuck this little chemical was strong as it is
on a daily regiment, thought tomorrow Id skip
then was heavy on the vertigo I walked with a limp
I could see the pill laughing while I crawled in my skin
knowing I was feeling awful and would call for a fix
now im swallowing my pride with a gargle and rinse
as I fall to its feet, that I hauntingly kiss
residue from pill cutters that’ll clutter my desk
have it summon its hex like a gun to the head
had shows I couldn’t miss, events I couldn’t ditch
too much was on the line for now I couldn’t win , I tried
fam visiting my symptoms had grew
everybody’s out mingling I hid in my room
I was crying with defeat, knew my mission was through
feeling sick with the flu another pill was consumed, I lost
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13. |
Last Forever
03:54
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Thought I found somebody real, I noticed our connection
never thought the path we headed to would have you change direction
I asked whats on your mind, never thought it be so damaging
you carefully had planned a perfect way to dig and bury me
but can it be that every thing I thought of you’s a lie?
were you going through the motions just to take me for a ride?
was thinking when I met you I would stand off to protect you
didn’t think I would be capable of feeling something special
every sentence was a chest move, I felt the need to test you
cause I thought she’d be too young to understand what’s in my mental
but the closer I would get to being with her made it real
afraid to take the dive, so I told her change the reel
I stayed cause days we chilled were getting better every moment
and she understood the balance of ourselves not losing focus of our life goals
supportive, we are both our biggest fans,
or at least I thought you were, now I don’t see you in the stands
we went from holding hands to holding off on future plans
truly scammed to thinking we could live together to advance
out of nowhere, no care, you dumped me with a cold stare
no flares to warn me of this accident id go near
hearing through the grapevine of someone you would facetime
the same one you would date a month after you went and changed, fine
he flew you out? cool, I wish you both a safe flight
was played and I admit it, you’re the winner of “game night”
your acting sure is sweet without a cavity grown
at least I know that you’ll be great in your reality show
it was accident prone, but at last I had known
that the acts of your past, relapsed, this chapter is closed, I’m ghost
used to hope that it would last forever
now I hope that its the last forever
now im on my own, guess I won’t be found, got me roaming so lonely again
see this path I’ve known, and these tracks been bound, got me roaming so lonely again
but each time I found that it hurts way worse than the last one taring me down
then I say Im done til the next one comes to assure me they want me to drown
if you love them let them go,
you kicked the chair beneath me left me hanging from a rope
pouring out prescription pills considered doing dope
and whats so fucked up is flash backs of my brother being so drugged up is all I saw
and suddenly I thought I understood the reason
fiending to escape the pain you feel when lost and grieving
thoughts deceiving been conditioned to run
hitting billy like “forgive me, but I need to feel numb”
feel im speaking in tongues, witnessed the beat I’ve become
liquor staining my rug like I dont need to be loved
you hoped that I would break it off, you wanted us to fail
you lost your sense of humor personality went stale
you didn’t give a fuck, apology was careless
just a couple days before that im supposed to meet your parents
the future planning damaged now im lonely and embarrassed
your flaws I overlooked, the good in you I cherished
all those convos that we had and those tears in your eyes
I just feel was a lie, like an evil disguise
everybody told me ‘chill’ they know the way it’d turn out
with the benefit of the doubt, you started letting me down
supported your decisions and forever im proud
at every gym in the world but this just couldn’t work out
my partner in crime just kept on crossing the line
I dont regret what we had, it just exhausted it’s time.
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