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Half Moons

from Broken Pieces by Upgrade

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lyrics

Half Moons on the table top
there’s no use I cant make it stop now

another failed attempt getting off a med, im stressed
thought I had in the bag and was strong enough to give it a rest
the withdrawal had me feeling like death,
suffered brain zaps that i wouldn’t wish on my ex,
accept im a wreck, check, wept, a pessimist, yes
night terrors that would haunt if i slept , the cause and effect
the nausea and stress, hence the jaw that i clenched
put the night guard into shreds while clawing my chest
the palpitations were adjacent to the palms that would sweat
the tinnitus that im fighting had the audio bent
had me screaming “fuck it all” could you pardon my french
suicidal thoughts vivid find it harder to vent
mother feeling helpless sitting at the edge of my bed
wishing she could talk me off the ledge of mental neglect
settle for less, relieve the pressure set on my head
can’t remember times better have no memory left

now im staring at this pill that I thought I could quit
how the fuck this little chemical was strong as it is
on a daily regiment, thought tomorrow Id skip
then was heavy on the vertigo I walked with a limp
I could see the pill laughing while I crawled in my skin
knowing I was feeling awful and would call for a fix
now im swallowing my pride with a gargle and rinse
as I fall to its feet, that I hauntingly kiss
residue from pill cutters that’ll clutter my desk
have it summon its hex like a gun to the head
had shows I couldn’t miss, events I couldn’t ditch
too much was on the line for now I couldn’t win , I tried
fam visiting my symptoms had grew
everybody’s out mingling I hid in my room
I was crying with defeat, knew my mission was through
feeling sick with the flu another pill was consumed, I lost

credits

from Broken Pieces, released April 12, 2019

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